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  • Jennifer Stafford

To Fight or Stay Down

Fight: To put forth a determined effort.

Where is your inner fight at? It does not matter what label you give it. Willpower, determination, courage. Where has it gone? You more than likely do not recall when you were an infant trying to crawl for the first time and continuously found yourself right back where you started on your belly. What about how you would keep getting back up after ending up on your butt when you first started walking?

Fear and doubt. When we were younger it was easier for us to believe in ourselves, we had more hope and accessing courage was not as challenging. Once we learn and understand that we can be hurt (physically, verbally and emotionally), we start to allow fear and doubt to stop us from trusting ourselves and what we are capable of doing. We begin to develop emotional wounds. When we accumulate unpleasant experiences with life and other people, we slowly stray away from trusting ourselves.

How come you have the courage to do some things and not others? What is the difference in the energy that you have to build up to be courageous enough to do those things and why can't you just put that energy towards what you find difficult or uncomfortable? If you can walk, ride a bike, drive a car, dribble a ball, write a sentence; we can go on all day about the early life experiences we had that we have forgotten took trusting in ourselves and believing that we could do it to get it done. When we are very young and inexperienced in life, we don't have emotional wounds telling us that we cannot do something or are not good enough. Fear and doubt are not running the show yet. Most walking adults were once toddlers that kept trying to walk, despite how many times they fell down. Toddlers do not have a repertoire of ways to remind themselves of the hurt, pain and fear that they have experienced. They are present and in the moment.

If believing in yourself does not come naturally, not to worry because it is something you can absolutely learn. It is a life changing skill. It is literally the difference between staying down and on your butt and getting back up to try again and again and again if needed.

Slow yourself down and figure out how to fight again, especially when it feels challenging. It's your life.

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